Shadows

One more minute with you and I saw everything I needed to see. You're emotionally, stunted. You're crystallized in your mentality. You are exactly with the person you're supposed to be with. She's perfect for you because her depths are as shallow as yours.

You don't want the real. You couldn't handle the intensity. All you have is physical strength but it pales in comparison to the kind of inner fortitude you'd need to handle someone like me.

You don't have it. You lack that kind of special quality. Don't get me wrong, you're a good guy. But, you can't be 'that' guy. I saw that about you sitting quietly, next to you, as you said this or that thing. 

I got that taste in my mouth, that familiar and bitter taste, as I realized you could never understand a woman like me. I tried so hard to get that other taste to return. But, it was too late. On my way home, there it was again with me, just lingering against the noise of the sub on the tracks. All my thoughts zipping fast, scrawled along the windows...there was no stopping them.

So what if you're around? So what if you're in front of me, while my spirit operates above you? We'll never be equals. You'll never get me. Whatever tenderness I recognize in you, is already a tenderness I possess. It's not enough. It's just not enough.

So, I'm crushed being confronted by this shadow coming to light. I ought to be grateful that the light came through. But sometimes, oh god, sometimes, I'd rather live in the shadows.