The Nine of Pentacles
I am alone in this space and it suits me just fine. I have everything I need, although not necessarily everything that I want. And, that's okay...I place my books on the living room table and head for the divan.
Yes, it can get lonely. The loneliness is a reminder of a longing that no one can satiate. I long for its own sake. It builds character, refinement and beauty.
I remove my clothes and set them to the side. I stretch my arms out and close my eyes. I am alive. I am protected. The fabric of the sofa feels soft against my skin. I take a deep breath and then sigh. I can hear the sound of chirping birds through the open window. I can smell the scent of roses from the garden and a hint of sandalwood from yesterday's incense burning.
I remember what he said to me when we first met, "Love is too expensive. I'll never give that way, again. I can't. I won't." I tell him I don't need his money. I can take care of myself. I do take care of myself. He thinks I'm pretty...kind...generous...
